a Cheap Holiday: 12/01/2002 - 01/01/2003

Cheap Holiday

Welcome to a cheap holiday in my life. At least you get to go home at the end of the day!

Sunday, December 15, 2002

Tonight I am reminded of how strange I am...

I am invited by a girlfriend to attend a Christmas party at a condo on Rittenhouse Square. This is a social step up in the world for my girlfriends and I - certainly none of us could afford such a home.

The host has tastefully decorated his apartment in colors of sage and lemon and brushed stainless kitchen fixtures. I feel terribly out of place amongst men dressed in crew neck sweaters. I find myself bonding with a terribly blonde girl over the Holyfield/Byrd heavyweight fight on HBO.

Afterwards, around 1:30am, I find myself walking 10 blocks home, alone. I do this all the time, walking alone in the city late at night. It's not prudent, but I've never cared. I've never known if I just no longer have a fear of death or assault, or was just stupid, but for the last 5 years, I have often walked home alone without incident. But I walk with my gloved hands outside my pockets, clenched in fists, ready for anything. Who am I fooling, I'm too drunk on Cap'n Morgans and Coke to be a serious threat. But, by Goddess, no one is taking me down without a fight.

As usual, I arrive home with only a serious case of metatarsal muscular burn from my 3" high heels to tell the tale. Once again, my false sense of imperviousness is reinforced by circumstance. Once again I'm left to wonder, was I really the weirdest girl at the party?

Thursday, December 12, 2002

The sights and sounds of the holidays are full-throttle upon us and I find myself obsessed with my ass. Yes, my ass. Not your ass or his ass or anyone else's, but my own. I'm hoping to take a trip to Vegas in March as a little celebration gift to myself for completing a giganticus project at the end of February, and I would really like to be able to buy a new bikini and strut around a little bit and in order for me to feel comfortable doing so I will need a refurbished ass. I'm eating protein and doing my workout daily, which includes a huge number of dips, squats, lunges, and the like. Perhaps after the new year I will either switch gyms, start taking Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu in earnest, or join a 6-week conditioning program. So far, I've lost two pounds, with an onerous 13 left to lose. I'll hit my usual plateau in about 3 more pounds and it'll be closer to Starvation City for the remaining 10 pounds. I hate the idea that perhaps in the Bronze Age I would have been considered a worthy asset for my ability to withstand famine for a longer period of time, but that in the Information Age I'm viewed as being obese. Feh.